a calm aways away

you don’t hear me

no-one can

no can

do man

labyrinthine disaffection

it’s my favorite to bear

the summer star shy

underneath winter’s night

REVERIES
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REVERIES 24 #97 "love fuss"
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Just as I started getting busy with writing blog posts it all fell off a cliff. Not sure why, but I feel a conflict about it.

Mostly the conflict would just be that I want to have things to share with the ethereal internet, new shows and rad news and all that cool making stuff. Honestly I just don’t right now. Have that much. To say.

I’ve been in a period of transition. I’ve become accustomed to not expecting too much. I’ve been not enthralled with the music world in general. It all has added up.

Transition just being more work. Time less cloudy.

Accustomed to not expecting too much meaning that well, I haven’t been super involved or am not receiving a ton of feedback/awesome news on the music front so like, ok. If what they say about successful people dealing with many many failures than I am sure to be super successful soon! Music blogs ignore me, venues don’t write me back, and festival submissions rejected. It’s been rough, if I’m honest. But (thankfully?) it’s to the point where I’m a bit numb about it. I am too stubborn or full of belief to really accept or believe that it means the music isn’t GOOD per se. It’s just not landing smoothly. Um. I don’t know. Whatever the reason, be it that I don’t jive well with the contemporary indie-music thing, be it that it is not produced well enough, be it that it hella sucks, there’s a whole lotta nothing going on. So I’ll just admit that. Yes it bums me out. Yes it leads to a bit of a personal crisis. No I don’t feel sorry for myself.

Not enthralled with music world in general. I just don’t love where music is at right now. It’s all so major key and irreverent. It’s all so brightly colored raybans and skinny jeans. It all feels like it would fit well in a gap commercial. Not all. But so much of it. There are cracks in its armor. But it’s hard to be doing really passionate wild loud music right now.

When we play out though it’s not hard at all. People respond. I’m glad to have found a drummer to play shows with, Tripp Beam. I feel that when we play it is awesome.

I’ve been attempting to record some video takes of songs real raw. But man it’s hard. The second the record button is pressed my brain can’t process words and then, sadly, I have control over the edit and I decide I look dumb and no-one will ever see these takes. But soon I will get it all straight. And I’ll be recording live raw takes of old and new songs and putting them out on the fly.

So like… that’s it. I guess you could say that more is to come. I guess you could probably bet on it. Hope this post isn’t a downer. It’s just honest. I say onward. I say on to more and better and music and thank you. Thank YOU for reading. I will talk with you soon, I hope.