we really have got to change

And sometimes you just go for it. I’m thinking we’re moving out of our cabin here soon… Staying in Mendocino, but looking for another place to live, more light, closer to the ocean.

We’ve actually found this really nice place for the Summer, and I think that after much debate we are looking to move there… It has a view of the ocean from high above Mendocino, is about 3 minutes from town, has a huge yard, lots of light, two decks…

Pretty nice actually.

It makes me sad in some way and is actually even hard to admit in this format on the blog, because everything up to now has been about how perfect life is in that little cabin.

But your desires and needs change, and the reality of a situation changes in a New York minute.

Can one pay for happiness? I think honestly, in a sense yes. Especially in this country. And if you can, you should.

Nothing is more important than health and happiness (?)

What do you think?

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  1. the only reason i have stepped forward to comment on this is your last line.. or was it the second last… “Nothing is more important than health and happiness.”
    i’ve recently experienced a life revelation where i am in search of happiness. i have always been a content person, but lately i’ve been taking a step back and really analyzing things, and i’ve found that i’m just doing what i have to do because i think that i have to do it. and that’s a crock of shit. i used to be really happy, i mean, i used to be able to just sit back and smile and think “yea, this is a great life”.. but lately i’ve been horribly unhappy. i mean, i’ve been bursting out into tears at the drop of a hat and things like that (and no, i’m not pregnant).. so yea. i am not a happy camper. i’ve realized though that there is reasoning to it, and in order to get back to where i want to be i’ve just got to step up and change a few things in my life. for one, i’m a student right now and that isn’t doing it for me. i truly believe that i’m not cut out for the science program in university. so to my parent’s dismay, i am finishing this semester of school and not returning next year. not never to return again, just not at this point in my life. i’d like to be one of those old ladies in teh back of the class who are only auditing the course. i think that’s where it’s at. anyhow, my dad is goign to shit but i’ve thought about this long and hard and i think i am finally going to sacrifice his happiness for my own (after 21 years of trying to please the guy) i’ve decided that i should pack up and hit the road in search of something good. or something better than this. i have a shitload of stress because i’m a poor student, so first on the list is a job to make some money and pay off existing debt. it really bothers me when i don’t have money to buy the things i want, and although this sounds terribly bratty of me it’s not, i don’t want much, which increases the frustration when i don’t have fifteen dollars to buy a cd. so really, i would rather flip burgers and have some pocket change than be paying school for an education that i barely even want, plus work my ass off to get it, plus be miserable for 4 years of my life. it’s just not where i want to be. another thing is that i work part time while in school, but htis is just to pay rent and bills and buy enough food and booze to sustain life. and all the while, i’m stressing about moeny and whether i’ll have enough or not. this leads to stress because i don’t have any time to do the things that i want to do, only the things that i have to get done. you see, i’m a huge art geek: avid painter, drawer, i play guitar, love music, etc. and i’m also an avid athlete and play competitive rugby (7th season) and rec hockey with some of the guys on the weekends. however, it doesn’t fit well in my schedule with midterms and work and emotional breakdowns. so getting back to finding happiness… ahh yes. i think i will find it on PEI.. which is home for me (canada).. and dissapoint my parents yet live a happy life and go from there. so.. i believe that moeny can’t buy happiness, but it sure can make being miserable a whole lot better.

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